


Revenge is Sweet

by fuzipenguin



Category: Trigun
Genre: Blow Jobs, Crack, Donuts, Established Relationship, Food Sex, Humor, Licking, Multi, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-05
Updated: 2020-08-05
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:48:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,194
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25720822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fuzipenguin/pseuds/fuzipenguin
Summary: Wolfwood would say Vash had unhealthy love for donuts. But what would he know?
Relationships: Vash the Stampede/Donuts, Vash the Stampede/Nicholas D. Wolfwood
Comments: 9
Kudos: 19





	Revenge is Sweet

**Author's Note:**

> No jelly donuts were harmed in the making of this fanfic. 
> 
> Originally published on my livejournal on 7.7.07. Edited a little (I loved to switch POV back and forth in the same or following paragraphs and now it bugs me) and uploaded here. 
> 
> From a springkink community prompt: Trigun - Vash/Wolfwood: Donuts in unusual places - "I swear if you don't get that away from me..."

It promised to be a great day. The sun was shining brightly, children were shrieking happily in the street below, and a baker’s dozen of freshly-made, hot-out-of-the-oven donuts rested in a heavenly smelling box on the table in front of Vash. Bending over, he inhaled deeply, eyelids fluttering shut.

He practically quivered with anticipation. 

Reverently, he lifted the cardboard lid and gazed down at the lovely ladies nestled inside. Four chocolate donuts with chocolate glaze and sprinkles; four cinnamon-sugar dusted donuts; four vanilla cake donuts; and his favorite, a strawberry jelly-filled, white powder-coated monstrosity that had been the reward of a shameless display of begging and puppy dog eyes.

Life was good. 

Vash surveyed the bounty laid out in front of him, knowing he had to make a decision. Which one to consume first? The jelly donut had to be saved for last of course, as it was the best. But out of the rest remaining, which one? 

A cough came from the bed behind him, but Vash ignored it, too focused on the monumental choice before him. 

“Damn. What a night,” Wolfwood said, the mattress squeaking as he shifted around. A whiny groan floated over to Vash’s ears.

“You opened the shades again. Didn’t I tell you to leave them closed until I got up? Geez. And you’re supposed to be so sensitive,” he grumbled. 

Vash didn’t reply, although he did glance over his shoulder, gaze lingering. Wolfwood stood and stretched, clad only in rumpled, black slacks that hung precariously on his sharp hipbones. His bare chest was covered in finger-shaped bruises and several pink marks that looked suspiciously like the imprints of teeth. A flick of a wrist, and the pants dropped away, leaving Wolfwood completely unclothed. 

“I’m going to take a shower,” he announced. He paused at the table, looking over Vash’s shoulder. 

Distracted by all the lean warm skin so close to him, Vash wasn’t in time to stop what happened next.

“Oh, hey, breakfast. Thanks!” Wolfwood plucked a donut from the very center of the box and sank his teeth into it. His eyes slipped closed in bliss. “Mmm. Jelly. My favorite,” he mumbled around the pieces of pastry in his mouth. 

Wolfwood’s eyes were shut, so he missed what Vash was sure was a horrified expression spreading across his face. There was no way Wolfwood missed the unholy scream that poured out of Vash’s mouth however, and he stepped back in alarm, hand patting at his hip for a gun that wasn’t there. 

“What? What is…oomph!”

Wolfwood flew through the air and landed haphazardly back on the bed, instinctively squirming to get away.

“Give it back!” Vash snarled. He grabbed for the donut miraculously still intact in Wolfwood’s hand. Once Wolfwood realized what Vash was talking about, he slumped in relief.

Then he smiled.

“Oh. You mean this?” He held it just out of reach, and Vash growled, trying to snatch it. As he did, Wolfwood slipped out from underneath Vash and jumped back, tossing the pastry back and forth between his hands. 

If there was ever a situation that Vash found Not Amusing…

“This isn’t funny, Wolfwood.” 

“Oh, but I think it is. Come and get it, big boy,” Nick taunted. 

Seeing red (and not his coat), Vash leaped. The abrupt motion surprised Wolfwood and jostled the donut out of his hand. They both grabbed for it, and it flew through the air, powder raining down like snow. One of them tripped, and they both ended up sprawled on the floor, Wolfwood’s face smashed against the floorboards from the weight of Vash’s body on his back. 

Vash would normally have been more careful, but he knew Wolfwood could take it. Liked it a little rough, even. And besides, there were more important things right now.

“Where is it? Where is it, you fiend?” Vash’s eyes frantically searched the floor. 

Wolfwood groaned. “I think I got a splinter in my dick,” he complained, bucking Vash off and rolling over. He stared down at himself. “Uh… Vash?” 

Vash looked over at him and whimpered, a wave of sorrow flooding him. “You… you…” he choked, an accusing finger pointing at Wolfwood, eyes nearly overflowing with tears. 

“Hey!” Wolfwood protested. “You tripped! Then fell on me!” 

Vash gazed forlornly at Wolfwood’s crotch, now decorated with mashed pieces of donut, smears of jelly, and topped off with a liberal sprinkling of white powder. 

“Ew.”

Wolfwood made a motion to wipe the mess off until Vash shouted “NO!” He dove between the priest’s legs as Wolfwood froze in surprise and licked up a large daub of red from just below Wolfwood’s belly button. 

Vash literally felt the weight of Wolfwood’s stare on the top of his spikey, blonde hair. “You’re insane.” 

“Waste not, want not,” Vash returned, in between licks. 

Vash’s nose bumped against Wolfwood’s cock, and it twitched in interest. “Hey, a little more to the left,” he suggested. Vash glanced up and extended his tongue until it made an agonizingly slow swipe on the underside of Wolfwood’s erection. Making a small noise, his legs spread open a little farther. 

“Now that’s more like it,” Wolfwood murmured.

Vash proceeded to use his mouth to clean up all the bits of donut and jelly off Wolfwood’s skin. Every third lick, Vash’s tongue made a wet path against the rapidly hardening erection bobbing between Wolfwood thighs. 

Finally, when no traces of baked goods remained, Vash caught Wolfwood’s eyes and smirked. He opened his mouth wider and slid his lips over the head of Wolfwood’s cock, tongue probing the slit. 

Wolfwood groaned, his head sinking back, loose on his neck. “Love your mouth,” he whispered, tangling his hand in Vash’s hair. Vash gave a powerful suck in response, tongue swirling under the head and humming gently. One hand cradled Wolfwood’s balls and rolled them between his fingers, thumb slipping down to rub behind them. Wolfwood groaned again, abdominal muscles contracting. 

All of a sudden, Vash drew backwards, cock leaving his mouth with a wet ‘pop’. He sat back on his heels and glared down at Wolfwood. 

“Now you know what it feels like.” Vash stood and sidestepped the grabbing hand flailing about his ankles. 

“Vash! Damnit! Get back here. It was only a donut!” Wolfwood sat part of the way up and froze, cringing when he saw the look on Vash’s face. 

“Only a donut? _Only_ a donut! Blasphemer!” 

Wolfwood dropped the rest of the way to the floor, head thunking against the wood boards. “You have got to be kidding me,” he said, closing his eyes. 

Vash grabbed the box of remaining donuts and strode to the door, red coattails fluttering about his legs like agitated sparrows. “Me and my box of ‘only’ donuts will be downstairs. Enjoy your shower.” 

He flounced out of the room, slamming the door behind him hard enough to shake dust loose from the ceiling. Vash was normally quite fond of his companion, but right now he viciously hoped the man’s balls would fall off. The thought was a bit violent for him, but it wasn’t like Wolfwood couldn’t live without them. And really…

‘Only a donut’! 

  
~ End


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